• Consciousness,  Ego,  Embodiment,  Practice

    What is embodiment?

    Everytime I hear the term embodiment it rings in me like something I long to realize.  I have an intuitive notion of what embodiment means and the string of this knowing is plucked each time I read or hear about it – leaving a vibratory ache for greater understanding that is ineffable.  I believe that my understanding of embodiment will continue to evolve for the rest of my life.  For now, all I know is that there are times when I feel more filled out, like more of me is permitted to live.   There are times when my attention is not captivated by my ego and it holds the tender elements…

  • Inner Work,  Intelligence

    A Full Range of Emotion

    I’m no stoic.  Despite all my efforts, I have not been able to quell the torrents of my  feeling heart.  In fact in this moment I feel: –   Content that I can relax in a sunwarmed chair in my favourite coffee shop. –   Relief for having time to write my blog. –   Anxiety because I really should be doing something other than writing my blog. – Sad that my gramma is in hospital –   Happy that after a 14 month marathon I have finished my Master’s coursework Moment by moment I feel these emotions whirling and storming through me, each with different intensities and flavours.  Depending on who you ask this may be considered…

  • Ego,  Intelligence,  spirituality,  Yoga in the Everyday

    The Forces of A Greater Will

    An osteopath friend told me a few months ago that my daughter tends to hinge at her hips and neck when she moves rather than moving her spine.  This comes as not surprise given that I have a rigid spine compared to the hyper mobile joints at my hips and shoulders.  Wanting to create balance in her body, I’ve been campaigning somewhat to get her to move from her spine more – “Look Rowan!  Can you roll like a ball?  Can you wiggle side to side like mama?”  I’ve seen some change in her ability to round her back more fully into flexion, but generally it’s not been significant. As…

  • Inner Work,  Inspiration,  Practice

    Yoga and Emotion

    Sometimes I love to revel in how immensely practical yoga and spirituality can be.  As a very sentimental person I find myself in the throes of wild emotional forces within me daily.  For many years I had minimal ability to make space for this inner wilderness.  Instead, I would find myself angry, depressed or anxious, yet I knew intuitively there was another way to allow the forces to move in me without being towed under by them.  This way has slowed shown itself to me over time through my practices and most especially yoga. Yoga calls us to be completely present amidst awkward and difficult sensations.  We are asked to stay with the inner…

  • Consciousness,  Inner Work,  Inspiration,  Practice

    To Be Fully Alive

    To be fully alive, expanding in all directions. This is my deepest wish, and my greatest fear. What does it mean to be fully alive?    This question has been haunting me in various forms for most of my life.  I can’t say that I’ve come to any conclusions about it.  Instead, I suspend the question in my heart and what rises in brief lucid moments is a vision of a radiant sun, expanding in all directions from the center of my chest.  I see it and feel it now and it brings soft tears to my eyes.  I sense that this symbol represents two things.   The first is that I can become…

  • Inner Work,  Yoga in the Everyday

    Yoga’s Not a Bandaid.

    Every once in a while I get sick of trying to make myself feel better with yoga.  Yesterday was such a day. After a small argument with my husband I prepared to enter the haven of my practice and I couldn’t.  Every time I approached my mat a well of anger rose up in me.  I could have simply trudged through the thick wall of irritation that paralyzed my movements, as some approaches to yoga advise.  Instead I fell onto my bed, face stuffed cock-eyed into a pillow and stared blankly into the mess of my ensuite bathroom.  Blink.  “What the hell’s going on?”  Blink.  “I only have an hour until Rowan wakes…

  • Consciousness,  Inner Work,  Non-duality,  spirituality

    Manomaya Kosha – The Feeling and Emotional Body

    I’ve been actively avoiding this post all week. I have often guarded my feelings and emotions and so publicly writing about it fills me with fear.  I’m afraid to be honest, I’m afraid that I won’t be honest.  So I start there.  In the fear.  I move through the first two sheaths with ease, I am comfortable here, in sensation and energy.  And then I bump up against a wall of butterflies- this is often how I feel fear or anxiety – as mass of butterflies that jitter in my torso.  And the butterflies go nowhere.  They just flit about in chaotic non-patterns, bunging up any sense of flow within me.I bring more awareness to this moving, immovable mass.  As I do this the butterflies seem…

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